i requested fer off from work ytd cos i wanted to go fer trg
and so...i got it
budden i received a msg frm ms ding to remind me to turn up fer flag day
damn how cud i forget.
and so...i went fer flag day fer the sake of cip hrs
budden it turned up tt only 11 ppl came
if i had know earlier, i wld have go fer trg.
argh.damn it
i jus hope i cud get the 3days off from work fer the camp
if nt i'll most probably....quit my job.

work has become less tough cos ive got used to it there
of cos there are ppl who are nt as nice
they like to order ppl ard.gossip here and there.
acting all so nice and den when u least expect it, they'll backstab you.
there are also unfriendly ppl who like to sow discord among colleagues.
but everything is still bearable cos nobody had targetted on me...yet.
so tt's fine with me.

it really tears me apart when i noe i cant fulfill all my commitments.
we rule by desire but we work by ability.
when willingness becomes an obligation, does love and passion still exist?

today's my off day.like...finally
working's tough.esp when i got to juggle between cca,work and studies.
sometimes i have to skip trg cos it clashes wif my work
and i cant choose the timing of my work since im still a trainee
and other times i have to go fer trg in the morning den rush to work in the afternoon
it drains the energy out of me but still im a happy gal
i feel like im spending my day in a fruitful way
if im nt working,i'll be gg out and slacking anyway.
and at least after a long day of work, he will be dere to fetch me
he'll listen to me tok abt my work and he'll tell me abt his canoeing.
it really cheers me up cos simple chats like these do matter
i noe he cares and i noe i care too
i jus wan to see him.hear his voice.feel his warmth.
and listen to him tell me how much he misses/loves me.(haha)
i like the feeling of being protected by him.
cos i feel like a young gal once agn

so...working at candybar is alright i guess
nt as bad as ive guess.
besides the permanent scar caused by the poping of popcorns
everything's fine
it's pretty amazing tt the whole cinema is run by mostly youngsters
and we are all independent workers but yet team players.
tt's so much more fer me to learn.
it will be a long time before i can noe the whole operation of the cinema well
but i think i will like the job.

my OP is finally over.
no more pw anymore.
though im nt very close wif my grp but still it's rather pleasant to work with them
no quarrels no conflicts no unhappiness.
everyone does their part.
it was jus hey come on,let's do it and get it done over with
it was really a peaceful grp

been working these few days.
eyeing those comp tixs.haha.
pay's rather low but it's near my hse and i like the jobscope.
at least fer box office.
get to sit down in an air con room.smile smile.type smth on com den count $$.
but i wld be changing to either candy bar or floor soon
i'll miss my box office and uncle teck!
the ppl i met there so far are really nice.
met some really funny movie goers
there's this guy who keep insisting to have couple seats but apparently gv yishun doesnt have a single one.
den saw this auntie who participated in the jue dui superstar auntie twice.
she was like saying to her fren 'i have to da pan mei mei or else ppl will recognize me'
ytd saw another actor.he was so funny lah.
and i duno gv got so many vouchers and promotions.
im having a hard time remembering them.argh.

anyway went to see doc abt my toe. it's coming out soon.
and when it really does, i think it will be super disgusting.
so now i cant wear covered shoes fer long cos it hurts
i even secretly took them out when i worked.lol.
sometimes only lah.ok.occasionally lah.
no no no,i'll change it to rarely=P

thanks fer all those who wished me happy birthday (=

hubby.jie jie.yeeleng.sk.yuan.cally.joanne.jinxing.soonheng.
evelyn.yukai. melissa.weiliang.wanqi.jasmin.darren.huasheng.
yongliang.jeannette. sherry.wanyan.shuyi.shanting.agnes.tiara.
kaixiang.nicholas.xw and faith.huey huey.ashika.peishan.peiqi.
magdelene.

it was the best birthday i had. i feel reeeaaalllly loved, really i do=)
received smses from ppl tt i tot wld nvr rmb or wld have alr forgetten my bday.
it was really sweet of them.

celebrated my bday wif the 07 ppl on 08nov aft my match
u see i hadtowaitfertheprizepresentationandihadtobathe
so....i was terribly late.sorry guys.
but it was really sweet of yuan n fiona to come support me.
and we won the bowl champions.(=
so after the match i rushed down to town and i was pranked.
received smses like they cant make it and they refused to pick up my call.
i knew smth wasnt right
but i simply refused to let yuan go hm and abandoned me wif 2 guys.lol
i was shocked to see the whole gang of them at cafe cartel.
thanks ppl.fer the celebration.fer the ice cream and the present.
how i wish we all were still in the same class.
my class wld nvr do this kind of things fer each other.
this feeling of happiness is jus smth my class wld nvr get to noe.pretty pathetic.

celebrated my bday wif cally,sherry,jasmin and hubby on 09nov
sudden change of plans from www to zoo.
dun really mind cos zoo's fun too.
actually it was jus me,jasmin,cally and sherry who was gg to the zoo.
the day started bad becos we alight at the wrong bus stop and we waited fer the correct bus but at the wrong side. so we were stranded at some ulu-pandang place.
den it started to drizzle. den rain.
but still we continued wif our plans.
so we saw the different animals.took fotos.hide from the rain.
den suddenly out of nowhr hubby appeared.
i completely had no idea tt he had been following us.
to think i was so upset when he told me he cant celebrate my bday wif me
and now he actually gang up wif cally they all to prank me
i really dun have any clue abt this plan.
argh, i cant stand it. how can i be fooled.lol
but i like the prank anyway. it was a pleasant surprise.
met up wif tiffany after tt to dine at the seoul garden at tampines mall.
im a happy gal tt night.

thanks to all those who celebrated dis blessed day wif me.
i appreciate it. i still feel so loved!

darling, why din u wan me to call you tonight?
cos i dun feel like toking to anyone

baby i noe u just dun wan to tok to me
no, i jus dun wan to tok to anyone

baby are you angry at me?
no

silence...

baby i love you
uh-huh.ya,i noe

silence...

baby are u crying?
no

u sure?
yes

baby, can u tell me wad's on ur mind?
nothing

baby, how i wish i cud be right beside you so i no nid to call u everynight
dun be silly.it's nt possible

why,darling?dun u wan to be with me?
it's just impossible fer u to move hse.

[lol] tt's nt wad i mean. i meant i wish i cud marry you soon
so when are u gg to do tt?
i decide when the time is ripe.

when will the time be ripe?
ive alr told you. i'll decide

why cant i be the one to decide?
cos man's bigger than woman.
no.man is part of woMAN.
nah.man is the root word fer woman.
ok then.u go and earn loads of money first.i wan to live a good life
silence....

nobody in my whole life has asked me wad's on my mind.
it was pretty sweet at tt moment.
and it still is when i think of it.
but reality arent always sweet.
i dun wan to bask in fantasy forever
bring me out of our fairyland wld you?
i wanna conquer the reality wif you(=

just came back from dinner with my family
and i realized they are still the ones who love me the most
nt once did they blame me fer pangseh-ing them fer hubby.
they've been understanding towards my r/nship
and im really fortunate to them.
cos we noe how to love one another

they are always there supporting me even thou i did terribly fer my tests/exams.
they've nvr given up hopes on me
or blamed me fer my horrible results.
i noe it saddens my parents when they noe im not doing well
and i noe it pains them to see me struggling so hard
my mummy wld stay up late wif me whenever i have to mug till the midnights
it's her way of showing her love to me and i do appreciate, really.
so im going to do it fer my family.
they are still the ppl i care most.

i rmbered when i was still in pri sch
i was bullied by dis guy.
my sis stood up fer me and helped me to settle scores with him
tt is wad sisters are fer.
nobody else cud do this fer me agn
and i noe i cud always turned to her fer help agn
she would nvr let me feel bullied.
and she would nvr anyone bully me.
she'll protect me. and make me feel like a small child once agn.
i love her. i love my family
our kinship cud nvr be replaced.
and nobody
and i mean nobody can replace all of ur places in my heart.
cos u all are special to me.

went town wif cally to search fer jobs.
hopefully our applications would be accepted
let trgs and work immune me bah.

love me like there's no tml, will you?
_________________________________

sometimes i wonder why did ppl do the wrong things
so wad if they feel bad abt it after doing it?
it's alr done and over.
no pt trying to search fer excuses to justify it.
hoping tt u'll feel better when exactly u noe u arent
cos there's nth u can do to amend wad u've done.
i duno how izzit like to live with a gulity conscious
but im sure it isnt smth nice.

i duno how to pretend im all so nice and cosy
i dun nid to pretend im an angel
so u can continue to be one.
cos all i noe is tt i nid to be myself.
if u nid to be gulity so be it
if u think im unreasonable/evil or wad so ever.i dun care.
and if u think im talking abt u, it's ur business.

anyways HAPPY BIRTHDAY JEANNETTE!
hope u like the little bday celebration we had fer you ytd(=

trg was kinda hiong these few weeks.
but bo bian. comp's coming. we nid to be in the top form.
there's nvr a one man show.
all of u gals matter to the team.
we can do it dis time.
at the very least, we nid to challenge ourselves and overcome our limits.
nth is impossible fer us.
we arent alone on the field.
we'll always have the team to support us.
and touch ruggers are nvr quitters.
we lose as one. and we win as one.

met up wif hunk ytd
it was so hard to see him these few days.
he had commitment like canoeing, canoeing and CANOEING
nt tt he has any choice
i jus wish i cud be of some help to him as well
supporting him and be there fer him
i noe im unreasonable at times
nt understanding at some other times
and demanding and wilful at the rest of the time
but i noe i still care alot fer him.
no other guys wld love me as much
or do so much fer me
i noe i'll be upset tt he cant celebrate my bday wif me
but it's nt his choice as well.
it's really ok.
luckily there's still freeze and the 07 peeps.
im nt alone dis bday afterall(=

there may be alot of things i duno how to do
but at least i noe how to guard my possessions.
fiercely if i have to.